Ich bin Berliner !!!!

Our first week in our new town has been a bit surreal. Given that our new home is still completely empty (our furniture is expected to arrive sometime in mid July), we are staying at the one bedroom furnished apartment that Giuseppe is renting since his arrival here in April. It’s in Charlottensburg, very close to the City center (and to the inexorable Scientology Center…feels so L.A.) such that moving around is painless. 

Obviously, we had to take care of some bureaucracy: open my bank account, get a Credit Card (so incredibly easier compared to what we went through in Los Angeles), and register as new residents.  We went to the Bürgeramt (the resident’s Bureau). It’s mandatory for all new residents and must be done within 7 days of your arrival. Of course the first attempt was unsuccessful since the office closed down as soon as we arrived. At 10:00 am sharp an unsimpathetic lady placed a yellow hand written sign on her door and refused to accept our papers, despite our (futile) efforts to complain. The next morning I was literally the first one to show up at the office and this time things went smoother, despite the language.

Someone told me that everyone here speaks English. True, but only once they are done deriding your attempts to communicate with them in their own language, only after you made every effort to pronounce the few words you know. At that point, still with a hint of mockery on their face and in their voice, they address you with a perfect English and answer your questions. In our case, as soon as we entered the office, we asked: “Sprechen Sie English?”. Very politely the bureaucrat answered that, yes, he does speak English, outside the office !!! Nevertheless, we were able to obtain our Anmeldebestätigung (new certification of residency). Now we officially belong to this city!!!

We took Josh to see the new house and he loved it! Should I be concerned that our neighbor is the Ambassador of Iraq? Not that having security guards and cameras pointed at the street 24/7 is bad, it just doesn’t make you feel comfortable, given the current situation!

We had our very first German dinner at Alter Krug, a Biergarten close by. The beer is served as soon as you sit at the table and there are only two sizes: medium and large! Josh enjoyed his Wiener Schnitzel and, for the first time in months, I saw him devour the entire meal without complaining!

The surprises weren’t finished yet. In fact, after dinner we walked to the nearby Metro station to go back home: from the outside, the U-Bahn station in Dahlem-Dorf, with its thatched roof, shoud be a referral to a traditional northern-German farmhouse (eventhough to me is a clear evidence that the architects, F. and W. Hennings, were avid readers of Goscinny and Uderzo….

The platforms of the station are, ehm, “extravagant”: the artist, Wolf van Roy, from Berlin, clearly had a gaudy sense of humor or perhaps wanted to give his own rendition of the word “metrosexual”. 

Needless to say, I haven’t find anything similar in N.Y. !!!

During the following days, while Giuseppe was back at work, Josh and I did what regular tourists do. We visited some local attractions. We started at the Brandenburger Tor, which was almost entirely concealed by massive music speakers and an immense stage for the celebrations of the 2014 FIFA World Cup. 

Along the interminable Straße des 17 Juni there were hundreds of  stands, selling all types of Pretzels, Knusperstangen, Käse Brezel, and of course beer, beer and more beer. The street is so wide it could easily fit an airplane. In fact, I read that it was used as a landing strip during WWII! It was still empty but a few night after, we saw it on TV completely congested by the immense crowd celebrating the victory of the Germany national football team.

The afternoon was torrid and humid, in contrast with the typical California weather. We found some relief from the heat by walking in the shade of the contiguous  Tiergarten, the urban public park that is located in the middle of Berlin. It is unquestionably a stunning site: we found canals, small lakes, playgrounds all over the area. It’s easy to understand why it’s called the green oasis or the green lung of the German capital, with its 210 ha filled with linden, maples, oaks, plane trees, and chestnuts.  

Our touristic expedition ended, dramatically, at the Siegessäule, aka the Victory Column. 

 
Josh wanted to reach the top to take some pictures. Regrettably, I agreed to climb with him the steep spiral staircase of 285 steps. About halfway to the top, I started panicking and at that point I realized that I had no escape. Doomed at 50 meters high! I had a full blown out panic attack (sweating, trembling, shortness of breath, numbness, hyperventilation, muscular cramps and trisma…). Poor Josh was so startled! He didn’t know what to do! Lucky for me (and for him), someone passed me a plastic bag to breath in and I started to calm down. Josh finally went to the top in order to take some picture. Initially he wasn’t sure he could leave me alone, then he realized that I wasn’t going anywhere, with my hands clenched around the handrail and my eyes shut closed. 

While I was sitting on the stairs, meticulously counting my 7-11 breathing, I had a flashback. It was 1998: Giuseppe and I were in Zion Canyon when we decided to complete the 2.4 miles trail that leads to the top of Angels Landing.  we were hiking on Angels Landing. We passed Walter’s Wiggles and its switchbacks. We were committed to reach the top and get a glimpse of the breathtaking panorama from the Scout Outlook at 5,700 feet. Needless to say, I never reached the top. All I remember are my hands holding painfully tightly the chains that should be used to help you in the last half-mile to the top. 

My dear ex-boyfriend (aka husband) was initially terrified by my reaction. Then, after a while, he regain his calmness and decided that, since I was practically bonded to the chain and I wasn’t going to run away, it was his chance to see the eagle’s nest that is apparently located on the top. Like father, like son!

Going back to the present, about an hour later, with some help from a tourist and my son, I was finally able to return to the base, just to find out that someone had called the ambulance!!!! 

Josh was so embarrassed he hardly spoke to me for the next 30 minutes.

We concluded our adventurous day by having dinner at the Dicke Wirtin, a small restaurant best known for its local cuisine: schnitzel, pork chops, fried potatoes and….Gulaschsuppe for Josh!!!!

We had one more place to visit before heading to Italy: Josh’s new school. It is located just 5 km down the main road and we were able to reach it by bus (20 min drive only!). From the main road we couldn’t see it, so I decided to ask directions to a woman who was walking near us. She told us that we were going in the right direction but that, giving the summer vacation, the school was closed. We told her that our son was going to start in August his 7^th grade and that we just wanted to take a look at the campus from the outside. She turned to Josh and asked him: ”What is your name?” Josh, a little startled by her perfect English accent, timidly replied: “My name is Giovanni Sebastiano”. “Ah, Caire!!!” said her.

My first thought, while staring at my son with a reprimanding look, was: “How on Earth can a perfect stranger know my son’s name? What did he do to be recognized even here? Is this a bad omen?”. It turned out that she was the Secretary of the High School who had handled Josh’s admission package. Such a coincidence…

...such a relief!!